Love isn't something that we find, it's something that we do.
-- CLINT BLACK, SOMETHING THAT WE DO
For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
-- RAINER MARIA RILKE
What's the only four-letter word you can't hear enough of? Love. We all want to feel it, hear it, and experience it. We search the world looking for it. We hope and pray to find it. We go to psychics, seminars, dating services, church, and therapy; read books; and have countless dates trying to find it or the map that leads to it. We'd be only so thrilled if the Home Shopping Network could package it and sell it and UPS could deliver it to our door.
Everyone knows why we take risk after risk searching for it. There's no greater feeling in the world than being in love. Love is the most potent natural aphrodisiac. Food, alcohol, or drugs can't replace it. It's a healer. It's our connection to the universal forces of life, or God.
Love is the gatekeeper that allows us to experience all other emotions. Without love we surround our hearts with a stonewall and eventually can't feel anything, until the wall is torn down. Love is what allows us to feel joy and sorrow; it gives us laughter and tears, provides strength for others and the need to be held. Love is a state of being that allows us to experience all things. It's not something that you find; it's a way of life.
Someone looking for the love of their life must have a clear understanding of what love is in their life. Think of love as a house. Self-love is the foundation of your house. If you have a weak love foundation, the house will be shaky. On the other hand, if you have a solid, strong love foundation, you have the opportunity to build a house full of more love in your life than you can imagine. The fact that you have self-love doesn't mean that you won't have to say no to some of the people trying to put inferior-quality materials in your house of love. There are always con artists out there testing us to see if we'll put things in our house of love that aren't healthy or don't match our requirements. However, if you have a strong foundation you'll have less to rebuild or will be able to recover more quickly if you accidentally put inferior products in your house.
Fortunately, you can always improve or change your foundation. In fact, keeping your foundation strong is a lifelong job. Different parts of your foundation may be weak at different times in your life. Sometimes you may have to work more on the foundation that supports your family; other times, on taking care of yourself; and yet other times, on the foundation of your relationship with your significant other. It seems some rooms of a house are used more than others, and the foundation that supports them may need more maintenance. But by constantly maintaining your foundation you'll get to spend most of your moments living in the flow of love.
When you're living in a state of love, life is an adventure. Each day life offers experiences that are full of opportunities to enjoy living on Earth. Living in love is about living in the moment. With rare exceptions, when you're focusing on the moment you're living in, not on the past or future, you can be happy and in a state of love. Love is the most abundant natural resource we have.
When you're living in a state of love, it's difficult to be angry, resentful, and bitter. Unfortunately, we live in a culture that likes to take inventories of people's actions and keep debits and credits. Some good deeds get a credit, and every offense receives a debit. At some point in our relationship we look at the balance sheet and see if we think everything has been fair. In a perfect world, debits and credits would always be balanced. However, we live on planet Earth. Everyone here is participating in a human experience and has to learn their individual spiritual lessons, so we create relationships in which the debits and the credits aren't always equal.
Even when you feel your debits and credits aren't equal, you can still access your infinite supply of love. It heals you so you can move forward. Of course, it's easier to access your infinite supply of love when you're living in a state of self-love.